My friend found out two days ago that her husband had been text messaging and calling a woman he met on a business trip. This has been going on for about 5 months. He swears nothing else happened--that it was just flirting. She feels like she's dying right now. They have a great marriage and she doesn't know why he would do something like this.

Any inputs?:)

:evil: For me, it would depend on the degree & perception. Why do I say that?

Degree, because if the husband already intends to do something about it like say meeting up or so on... then he's already setting it up for cheating because he would always want to find out or to go further with it. You have to ask, whats the intention... most often than not, they would know prior if they are already in the act of cheating or would intend/be willing to cheat. (based on personal experience. heheheh :evil:)

Perception, example would be ex pres Bill Clinton & the famous line "I did not have any sexual relationship with that woman" while refering to Monica Lewinsky. He said that while addressing the public. Yet he was saying that oral sex is not cheating! So again, it falls down to their perception of cheating & how they would define the boundaries of flirting, being friendly & cheating. Honestly, there's a very very thin line that I can't even see most of the times.

just my 2 cents on the topic.

Definitely.

Since they're already married and we know that marriage is a holy union of two individuals, and that they vowed to love each other faithfully, texting flirtatiously a 3rd party is already a violation of the
"we became one" thing.:rolleyes:

haha it's just my way of saying.... "one woman at a time".

Negative.

Its not cheating.

Wala lang tiwala yung friend mo sa asawa niya.

Take me for example.

My gf trusts me.

I cheat but when i tell her i dont cheat, her doubts go away!!!

ah ah ah!!!


They may have a great marriage and thats great.

Now if something is happening outside the marriage, extra curricular activity na lang yan.
Pwde rin extra-marital. (-:

BUT yeah, perception is a big factor.
Coz for your friend...its reality.

Like in the military.
If it looks like duck, talks like a duck, walks like a duck...then it is a Duck!!!!

My friend found out two days ago that her husband had been text messaging and calling a woman he met on a business trip. This has been going on for about 5 months. He swears nothing else happened--that it was just flirting. She feels like she's dying right now. They have a great marriage and she doesn't know why he would do something like this.

Any inputs?:)


I guess hubby's found someone to talk to and open up things he can't discuss with wifey. Imagine, he admitted that he's flirting. Ofcourse, wifey won't ask furthermore on other matters except the flirting. Wifey should ask hubby on what the problem is. If "something" did happened on hubby and the third party, wifey should accept and fight for hubby before he falls in love.

That's marriage! Filling up the weaknesses of each other. :*

women are so weak when it comes to this matter. IMHO its cheating... emotional cheating.. and panu sha nakaka sure na wala nga silang physical contact? why would it last for months if it is just plain flirting, texting and calling? and what the f@ck are they talking about? problems with partners? i've been in this sits and i know the feeling... totoong pag malaki trust mo sa asawa mo at nalaman na mo na nagloloko pala para kang mamamatay sa sakit. parang gusto mo ng mawala na lang sa mundo para wag mo na maramdaman ang sakit. pero kahit naman ano din mangyare papatawarin mo kase asawa mo eh. unless malaking damage nagawa nya. tapos pag pinatawad mo naman habambuhay nakatatak sa isip mo ang ginawa nya sayo. well, i learned my lesson so well... kahit ano mangyare ang lalake di aamin yan. kaya paniwalaan mo kung ano kutob mo at nakita mo. in short sha mismo mag investigate. di pwedeng hula hula lang or sabi sabi lang.

cheating comes in many forms. cheating can be physical and emotional. cheating can happpen face-to-face, online, via text, etc. sa UK (google it!), a couple divorced because the man was having an affair online via second life. second life is an online game of real people (think of SIMS) and the wife found the husband was having an affair (virtual). to me, that also qualifies as cheating.

flirting is cheating...:D

flirting is cheating...:D

eh eh eh!!!

NOT!

I think I have to take the 5th Ammendment on this Issue !!!! I do believe there is such as thing as self-incrimination kasi eh !!! So, subscribe nalang me !!! Bwahahahahahaha !!!!

IMO, texting and/or calling somebody else on your cellphone is not cheating. How can it be called cheating anyway? How would a wife know if his hubby is flirting with someone using his cellphone? Did the wifey check his cellphone? A good lawyer once said even though a guy gets caught in bed naked and all with another woman, it's still not enough proof that he's doing the wild thing with the woman IF and only IF there's no actual bodily movement. According to him, it's still not sufficient to prove that the guy is cheating against his wife. What if they were just talking or maybe doing some bible study or maybe they were just showing-off their "battle scars"?:O:rolleyes:

I salute the guy for admitting that he's texting and/or calling another woman. He did something brave just by admitting.:clap: Come to think of it, what if the one he's texting and/or calling is a she-male?:rolleyes: Unless of course if the wifey saw his hubby with the woman with her own 2 eyes doing the wild thing then it's another story.:D

IMO, texting and/or calling somebody else on your cellphone is not cheating. How can it be called cheating anyway? How would a wife know if his hubby is flirting with someone using his cellphone? Did the wifey check his cellphone? A good lawyer once said even though a guy gets caught in bed naked and all with another woman, it's still not enough proof that he's doing the wild thing with the woman IF and only IF there's no actual bodily movement. According to him, it's still not sufficient to prove that the guy is cheating against his wife. What if they were just talking or maybe doing some bible study or maybe they were just showing-off their "battle scars"?:O:rolleyes:

I salute the guy for admitting that he's texting and/or calling another woman. He did something brave just by admitting.:clap: Come to think of it, what if the one he's texting and/or calling is a she-male?:rolleyes: Unless of course if the wifey saw his hubby with the woman with her own 2 eyes doing the wild thing then it's another story.:D

Thats what am talking about!!!

Besides, since the guy admitted that hes sending sms to another woman, he already has nothing to hide!

Well im also a guy so yes im biased when it comes to this matter.

Kaya ill be technical as much as possible just to make it look that i never never cheat.

eh eh eh!!!

it's cheating if you get caught... :O

This is what I told her:

When you are married you are 1. So you should know everything. He shouldn't have to turn to anyone but his wife that's why you're his wife to be his life partner. He sounds like a liar. You aren't wrong for wanting to know everything and you deserve to know everything.

:C

^ you have to accept (also) the fact that not all married couple considered themselves as one. I am married and my friends are married but we all have something for ourselves just like our man. There will come a time that you will encounter a problem that you cannot tell to your husband because HE IS YOUR PROBLEM. But as you have said they have/had a great marriage, so why does the hubby find someone to talk to or to flirt to? if a man is happy in his home i cant see any reason to find happiness somewhere else. just like the women... if we are not happy in our marriage we find ways to make our life not miserable just because we are not happy at home. its just that MEN's way of finding happiness is different from ours...

Well for one, I believe that there's no such thing as innocent flirting. And text messaging, it always start from there. As far as I'm concerned, that is considered emotional infidelity. If left unchecked, it could wreck havoc to one's marriage.

IMHO.

^ you have to accept (also) the fact that not all married couple considered themselves as one.

this is cool for womanizers. it would tempt guys to play around with other flirts which will then yield headaches. Masarap ang feeling pag iniistriktuhan ka ng love mo (basta nasa lugar) and an occasional check-point will help prevent infidelity. What kind of a relationship would tolerate flirting outside the marriage??? Naglolokohan lang yata eh hehe. conservative ba dating :O

Unfortunately, putting a stop to this is going to do nothing. If he has got to a point where he has interest in someone and is willing to do this with her, even if it does stop there will be another. I don't give a rat for what people say about it not being technically cheating.

Anytime someone betrays you with another person, be it in person, text'ing, online, where ever it is cheating, if you allow your mind and your heart to stray... it is cheating. Along with this, he has and is continuing to blatantly LIE to you about this. Can you even sleep wondering if he is being like a three year old sneaking out of bed to sneak a cookie at 3 am? Just so he can get his fix with this other person?

I'm sorry.. but those are just my honest feelings.

For me it is considered as cheating simply because he's hiding it from his wife, most women always thinks negative well...obviously they'd really think that way hehehe...but the thing is they should look at the other side of it or the brighter side of it, they should think that "WHAT IF HE'S DOING IT ON TXT MESSAGES CAUSE HE DON'T WANNA DO IT IN REAL LIFE" He might prefer cheating on txt messages that has a small chances of harming their marriage rather than doing it in some other way, maybe his Husband just wanna preserve the marriage so it is enough for him to just simply do it in a txt message. There are reasons a woman should always consider that is why the word "MAYBE" & "WHAT IF" is somehow important to save a relationship. But it is still cheating hehehe...:D

My friend found out two days ago that her husband had been text messaging and calling a woman he met on a business trip. This has been going on for about 5 months. He swears nothing else happened--that it was just flirting. She feels like she's dying right now. They have a great marriage and she doesn't know why he would do something like this.

Any inputs?:)

hmmm.... if he is flirting through text... what more?

Well for one, I believe that there's no such thing as innocent flirting. And text messaging, it always start from there. As far as I'm concerned, that is considered emotional infidelity. If left unchecked, it could wreck havoc to one's marriage.

IMHO.

I definitely believe this. there's no such thing as innocent flirting.

All sorts of actions with the intention of hitting a woman is flirting.

I definitely believe this. there's no such thing as innocent flirting.

All sorts of actions with the intention of hitting a woman is flirting.


Very much true.
;)

For me it is considered as cheating simply because he's hiding it from his wife, most women always thinks negative well...obviously they'd really think that way hehehe...but the thing is they should look at the other side of it or the brighter side of it, they should think that "WHAT IF HE'S DOING IT ON TXT MESSAGES CAUSE HE DON'T WANNA DO IT IN REAL LIFE" He might prefer cheating on txt messages that has a small chances of harming their marriage rather than doing it in some other way, maybe his Husband just wanna preserve the marriage so it is enough for him to just simply do it in a txt message. There are reasons a woman should always consider that is why the word "MAYBE" & "WHAT IF" is somehow important to save a relationship. But it is still cheating hehehe...:D


If this happens once then it always stays there in the back of your head, guilty or not. Right?

Unfortunately, you either wait for a while to let it pass or it comes back daily and makes your life miserable. Either way, make him understand that flirting is unacceptable and very hurtful. If he loves you enough he will understand. Try to make him see it from your point of view. Di ba? ;)

Is text Messaging Cheating?

Almost...

Different person have different perception on this and quite subjective, it might depend also in the content of the massages. It may hard to tell in this forum that texting alone is cheating without full details.

Nevertheless cheating is cheating and can be done in different varieties.... Texting maybe the least one but dangerous as it creates a whole wide world of imagination wherein a person could easily say what he/she likes without or with minimum risk of embarrassment and could potentially lead to physical contact eventually......''

Different person have different perception on this and quite subjective, it might depend also in the content of the massages. It may hard to tell in this forum that texting alone is cheating without full details.

Nevertheless cheating is cheating and can be done in different varieties.... Texting maybe the least one but dangerous as it creates a whole wide world of imagination wherein a person could easily say what he/she likes without or with minimum risk of embarrassment and could potentially lead to physical contact eventually......''

if it's not a friendly text or quote, no I don't consider it as cheating.
If it's something else like not-so-friendly quote or personal message, well obviously that's cheating hehehe

cheating lang yan kapag me partner ka tas nakikipag mabutihan ka pa sa text sa iba....

lalo na patago....:rolleyes:

...in a way... YES...it will all start sa simple text then , excitement, the meet nakayo

Text messaging itself is not cheating but in cheating, text messaging could be a part of it.:*

yes kapag more than friendship na closeness nyo sa txt tas me partner ka naman pala...........

TExting? nah! it's not part of my vocabulary..hahahaha..I use my cellpnone as a Mp4..

depende namn wahehehe pero ako i use it for cheating hahaha

This is kind of irrelevant, but I just found it necessary to vent about the concept of cheating. It's something that I will never fully understand. I think someone else has said it in one of the threads, but if it's going to happen I'd just prefer the person to leave than be cheated on. If a person is so unfulfilled with someone, why don't they just break up with them and start over with someone who COULD make them happy?

Then again, there's always the idea of still having someone at home waiting for you when you come back from having your fun with someone else. I guess that's why they call it "cheating".

:o

if you'll text someone, whom your partneR don't know...thats CHEATING...